Two-Year Checkup and Coming Full Circle

Today I took Megan for her two-year-old appointment. She's doing great--36 inches tall (97th percentile) and 29 pounds (77th percentile).

Today we also made the decision to release the embryos that we had sitting in frozen storage at the fertility clinic. We decided to donate them for research. I know it was the right thing to do--we weren't planning to use them, and it felt wasteful to just dispose of them. We could have given them to a couple who needed donor embryos, but it just didn't feel right to us to possibly have "children" out there somewhere. So we decided to donate them in the hopes that the research in which they will be used will make a difference somewhere in the medical world.

We went to the clinic and saw a physician's assistant and a nurse who had been there when we conceived Megan (the nurse is Patti--see this entry for more about the terrific staff at the clinic). They didn't know that we had Michael, so it was fun to tell them about that.

It felt strange to sign the papers, though. Like the fertility journey was over, and we were signing away the possibility of more children. And it was a little sad to think that we were finished with having kids. But it also felt right. A little sad, but right. So, little embryos, safe journey. May you bring hope to others through science...the same science that helped us conceive Megan and Michael. Our little miracles.

Long Time Gone...

It has been forever since my last post. Much happening!

Michael turned seven months old on July 26. He is sitting up really well. He is slowly getting the hang of playing by himself--all those months of his being held finally caught up with us. He is still hit-or-miss when it comes to sleeping through the night. He's waking up anywhere from 3-5:30 a.m., and if he wakes up after 4 it is really hard to get him back down. Of course, we need to be up at 5:30 on weekdays anyway, so I'd happily take that! Michael is a very smiley and happy baby, which is wonderful.

Megan turned two on August 2. She is an amazing kid. She is definitely testing her limits (and ours, too), but sometimes she is just so funny that I have to bite my lip so I don't laugh. her latest thing is calling me "Jill." She knows she should call me Mommy--she just can't help herself--and has to slip in a "Jill" and then giggle. I keep correcting her, but deep down I just love the fact that she's got a rebellious streak in her. I doubt I'll be saying that when she's 13!

This is a family photo of us from Megan's birthday.

Michael's Six-Month Checkup

Michael had a great checkup today. Here are the vital stats:

Height: 27 ¼ inches (76th percentile)
Weight: 17 lbs., 3 oz. (48th percentile—of course, he ate right before he was weighed, so who really knows!)
Head Circumference: 17 inches (48th percentile)

He has a rash in the folds of his neck, but we got some cream for it and all should be fine!

Michael has tried rice cereal and squash so far. So the recipes are: rice cereal, squash, and rice cereal mixed with squash. But you have to start somewhere!

(For Megan's six-month checkup details, click here.)

Rice Cereal, Swimming. and Stevie Nicks

Michael started rice cereal this past week. He's not a huge fan. Of course, how anyone can truly be a "fan" of rice cereal is beyond my understanding!

Megan went swimming for the first time yesterday. She'd dipped her feet in, but this was the first time she'd really gotten into the pool. (I know, she's a California girl, she's almost two, and she is just now getting into a pool. Sorry, folks!) Here she is with P.C. in a really cool boat.

And Megan loves the Stevie Nicks/Tom Petty song, "Stop Draggin' My Heart Around." I remembered that I had a version of it on the DVR and played it for her. She's now requesting it regularly.

Six Months Old!

Michael turned six months today. Happy half-birthday, little one! He is definitely teething like crazy, but doing well.

Big sister Megan moved into the two-year-old room at daycare this week. So far, so good! She is changing so much every day--her use of words and sentences is incredible. Her favorite phrase right now is "Of course!" She's definitely testing her limits, but she is quite amazing.

Bubby

My wonderful grandmother passed away on Saturday, June 13. I went back to Baltimore last week to spend time with my family and to say goodbye to one of my favorite people in the world.

Above is a picture of Megan with Bubby when Megan was eight months old and Bubby was 93. Although Megan was hard to keep still at that age (still is, actually), she stayed totally still while Bubby held her. Amazing.

I chose not to speak at the funeral, because my mom, sister and cousin were already speaking, but below is a draft of what I wrote.

It is such an honor to stand before you today, as we remember Bessie Winer Salkin. Bess to many, Mom to a few, but to many of us, she was our Bubby.

In talking to members of my family, there is one prevailing thought: that while it is best for her to be at peace, we can’t imagine life without Bubby. And that somehow, 94 years just wasn’t enough for any of us.

When my daughter Megan was born, Bubby was 92. I knew I couldn’t name our daughter for her because she was still here on earth, but I wanted to do something to honor all she has given to my life. So Megan’s middle name is Salkin. So whenever I say my daughter’s full name, I am reminded of my grandmother’s strength, beauty and grace. And class. She had a lot of class.

I always tell people that Bubby helped raise Nancy and me, and it is certainly true. So many of my day-to-day childhood memories feature Bubby: Rocking me in the rocking chair in my bedroom, driving me home from nursery school down Park Heights Avenue and begging me not to fall asleep on the ride home so she could put me down for a nap; her big Oldsmobile with the square pillow and the crocheted cover; making babka in her kitchen; playing checkers on the big carpeted game board; Hanukkah parties; lots of sleepovers at her apartment. The smell of her skin and the softness of her hands. I’ve never felt softer hands. Never.

And the food! Babka, gefilte fish, challah, knishes, chicken soup. The kitchen was truly her safe haven. And I can’t watch Megan eating a raspberry without thinking of Bubby.

And then there were the Bubbyisms. I remember visiting with her when I was going through my divorce almost 12 years ago. She told me, “Sometimes you step in a pile of dog doo. You just wipe off your shoes and keep walking.” There are a few Bubbyisms that she taught me in Yiddish—unfortunately, I don’t quite think this is the time to repeat them! And how many of us can get in and out of a public restroom without touching a single thing? Yet another lesson from Bubby.

Three weeks ago, Bubby got to see her tenth great grandchild—the first boy, by the way—the other nine are all girls—when we Skyped with her two weeks ago. I held up five-month-old Michael and he stared at Bubby at the other end. And she was staring eight back—they were really taking each other in. My 22-month-old daughter pointed at the screen and said, “Bubby!” and they blew kisses at each other. The memory of the two of them blowing kisses is permanently etched in my brain.

Bubby loved people and people loved her. She was a real class act. Ask her what she thought and she’d tell you, even if you didn’t ask. But it was all done with lots and lots of love.

For her 90th birthday, the children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren wrote notes and drew pictures, and my mom, Frayda, compiled them into a book for her. What I wrote then seems appropriate to say now: Bubby, you are a fabulous, wonderful, giving, loving, smart, sassy, gutsy woman, and I truly believe my life is richer and stronger for having you in it.

Bless You, Mama!

I need to post new pics here, but in the meantime, a quick Megan story:

I sneezed tonight and Megan said, "Bless you, Mama!" Wow, this kid is awesome.